Fly Southwest: BOI to Tulsa, Oklahoma

Buckle up and brace yourself for a thrilling journey of satire, irony and harmless exaggeration as we traverse the aerial route from the somewhat-misplaced city of Boise to the heartland gem Tulsa, aboard the mighty flying steed known as Southwest. For all you enlightened voyagers, cast off your cloaks of dreariness as this isn't just about mundane flights; it's a verbal exploration of mythical proportions.

Set against a backdrop of nonsensical airfare structures and arbitrary pricing, this tale will take you on a quixotic journey through the skies. Pay heed to the words that follow, for they hold the secrets of unlocking the enigma of getting cheap flights, surviving economy class, and managing paltry baggage allowances. Along the adventure, we shall address the erstwhile question: 'To layover or not to layover?'

Now, draw back the curtain of the mundane and gaze upon the chariot that awaits. With little more than a sense of hope and a disregard for logic, you embark on this mass exodus from Boise towards the urban dreamscape of Tulsa, joining the legions of budget-conscious frequent flyers in their relentless pursuit of the perfect non-stop or perhaps even direct flights for mere mortals who have somewhere else to be.

We're not talking international flights here; no, this is a domestic jaunt. Nevertheless, this doesn't stop Southwest from insisting you pay in multiples of gold doubloons for even a smidge of extra legroom. Welcome to the grand theater of Southwest's economy class, where everyone has an aisle seat, unless they don't.

Stow your second-hand excitement as the airline reveals its baggage allowance policy: A modest offering designed to test your minimalist lifestyle aspirations. "Bring only what you can carry, but carry only what you can lose," seems to be their motto. For those with a penchant for carrying their entire living room, despair not! For you too can experience the joys of the surplus luggage penalty.

The airline presents to you its in-flight services, or lack thereof. The in-flight entertainment consists primarily of observing the precise shade of green your fellow travelers turn during turbulence. Don’t forget, the soft beige upholstery that frames each seat, specifically chosen to clash wonderfully with every possible outfit you might be wearing. Sit back and enjoy the stark contrast of Southwest's pleather seats and some very creative pretzel sandwich concoctions.

If you’re lucky enough, or daring enough, you may even become the subject of a last-minute flight deal. You know, the kind that magically appears just after you’ve cancelled your plans, and reappears each time you check your email, like a haunting echo from the trip that didn’t happen. Indeed, the gods of Southwest have a strange sense of humor.

Coming to the epic conclusion of our thrilling air travel saga, we discover that the real adventure lay not in the reaching, but the journey. Oh, what a journey! Flying on Southwest, from undefined in Boise to Tulsa, without knowing the flight's duration, is much like life itself. As Socrates might have put it, if he'd been an air traveler, “An unexamined flight is not worth taking.” Happy flying!