Fly Southwest: ELP to Punta Gorda, Florida

Always been fond of spontaneity? Then rejoice; for the world has granted you an airline that embodies your spirit, albeit mockingly. The surprising Southwest, a beacon of inconsistency and a marvel of modern aviation, with a charm somewhat akin to a dance where no-one knows the steps.

An entity that is a master of paradox, where the “non-stop” flights have layovers, and “direct flights” aren’t necessarily straight from A to B. Buckle up boys and girls; it's time for the unforgettable Southwest experience!

Basically, the cannonball run of the skies commences at the wonderfully vague location of “undefined” somewhere in El Paso. That's right, "undefined." Still working out what that signifies? Maybe it's a hip, unknown coffee shop, or perhaps an obscure landmark. Ah, the sheer joy of ambiguity!

Return flights? You jest, dear traveler! That would imply some level of regularity to the system. There are “round-trip” options, instead. So, imagine you're a boomerang, thrown into the air, not knowing where you'll land, maybe even taking a detour or two before you find yourself returning to the beginning. Now, who said airfare couldn’t be philosophically deep?

The main event takes place in Punta Gorda - a name I’m sure was selected for its humorous undertone, because nothing screams hilarity more than starting a journey from the undefined El Paso. It's another joke on you, dear traveler, but you need to have respect for the genius which combines a love of humor and libertarian enforcement of loose flight schedules and enigmatic departure points.

You’d think an arrival airport would be a given, but alas, this is Southwest - the pioneers of “we’ll get there when we get there”. It adds to the suspense and the charm of the journey. It magnifies the allure of the unseen and unknown, pushing the boundaries of the regular flight experience. Setting foot in the aircraft is quite literally stepping into the unknown, sort of like Alice’s tumble down the rabbit hole, only with less tea and more turbulence.

Do you like surprises, dear traveler? Then you might enjoy the Southwest’s affordable game of Russian roulette with their “flight cancellation policy”. The essence of it is this: the flight may be cancelled, or it may not. It's not about whether it's half-empty or half-full, but rather about whether the glass even exists. Ah, meta-physical air travel. Isn’t it invigorating?

Oh, lest we forget the “baggage allowance” saga. Dear traveler, you have the luxurious allowance of a bag plus a carry-on. But, the contents, size and weight of said bag is a delightful game of "will it or won't it make the cut?" Carry a hearty spirit and a sense of humor, the only truly necessary baggage in this journey!

Southwest - where every flight is a leap of faith, every journey an adventure, and every passenger an unsuspecting participant in a cosmic joke. Embrace the chaos and make way to undefined fortunes and vaguely probable destinations. Bon voyage!

Fly Southwest. Plain. Simple. Undefined.