Fly Southwest: HNL to Belleville, Illinois

There is a certain perverse joy in examining the intricacies and absurdities of air travel. From the curious customs of the in-flight cabin service to the hot-button topics of legroom and baggage allowance, the world of flying is a microcosm begging for analysis. This time, our dissection table is graced by the subject of Southwest's flights from the tropical paradise of Honolulu to the bustling metropolis of Belleville.

Direct flights are a delightful enigma, seeming almost too good to be true, like finding a unicorn in your backyard or witnessing a politician stick to campaign promises. Coming out of Honolulu, Southwest Airlines firmly states, "Belleville, Here You Come!" as if using a non-stop flight is as commonplace as having a cup of coffee. However, pure logic, having the sobering effect of an unexpected cold shower, tells you that Belleville lacks the glamour to warrant such an esteemed air route.

You see, airfare, like a trove of pirate treasure, is largely dependent on the desirability of the destination amongst the masses. Las Vegas, New York, and Los Angeles; they merit the glamour of non-stop and direct flights from tropical Honolulu. But Belleville? Whoa, Southwest! Let's not get too ahead of ourselves here.

In examining Southwest’s flight schedule, one finds that traveling to Belleville frequently involves layovers, prompting one to ponder deeply over the one-way versus round-trip debate. Round-trip tickets provide the reassurance of having a clearly planned itinerary but hold the slight sting of commitment. It locks you down to a return date, leaving little room for serendipitous exploits, like falling in love with Belleville (stop laughing, it could happen) and deciding to extend your stay. One-way, however, brims with the allure of flexibility, allowing you to buy a return ticket when Belleville has had enough charm to coax you back to the ticket counter. But then, isn't life all about making choices?

Business class or economy class? Let’s be honest. Unless you have scored a killer flight deal, or you are a frequent flyer who has somehow accumulated enough miles to book a flight to the moon and back, chances are you'll be crammed into an economy seat. As our analytical mind reminds us, one must see the comedy of the situation. Just think of all the human contortion possibilities as you tussle for elbow space and the right to recline. Certainly, something to laugh at, right?

Finally let’s weigh in on the baggage allowance debate. You could argue that your grandmother's antique hula dancer souvenir deserving of a suitcase of its own makes perfect sense. Southwest, however, may express slight indifference at this request. And by indifference, I mean restricting your baggage allowance to something that would challenge a minimalist heaven-bent on achieving sainthood. The lesson here – pack light, or face the judgment of the Southwest baggage gods.

Air travel, especially with Southwest's unique flavors of humor and the audacity to offer a flight schedule that includes Belleville, is ripe material for satire. From the wondrous debate between one-way and round-trip flights to the farcical matter of baggage allowance, there's plenty to muse over as we navigate the frenetic world of Honolulu-Belleville travel. Oh, Southwest. You beautifully comic oddball, you.