Fly Southwest: MCI to Moline, Illinois

Oh, you're planning on flying Southwest from that veritable metropolis known as 'Undefined,' Kansas City to Moline, are you? Well, aren't we ambitious! Hold your aerial chariots, my starry-eyed wanderlust warrior. We have some ground to cover first.

Now, some might advise on leg-numbing layovers, night-stealing red-eye flights, or the pinch-your-wallet-hard, last-minute flights. But you? You're not some average, run-of-the-mill passenger. You recognize the undeniable beauty of direct flights: no rushing dip-, skip- and hop-like from one terminal to another. Oh no! Not on your Southwest journey! Let's bask in the glory of point-to-point convenience, shall we?

There’s the tricky business with the prime-time to book your ticket. Ah the "best time to book", a phrase that drives chills down the spines of everyday travelers. Would you believe it if I told you Monday at 3:27 p.m. is your golden hour? Yes, my friend, the secret to cheap flights isn't kept under the wings of some mythical flying beast. Just remember: the early bird catches the...cheap airfare? I'm not too good with idioms but you get the point, right?

You're really playing this one to the hilt; I respect that. You're a frequent flyer, no doubt about it. And let me guess—you're already part of their mileage program. After all, what self-respecting globetrotter isn't part of every airline's loyalty program they've even casually glanced at? Every mile is a gem, every airport a mining site. You, my friend, are truly ahead of the curve.

Let's turn to in-flight services, shall we? Oh, nothing like the supreme satisfaction of sipping lukewarm coffee while hunched in a space smaller than a bachelor penguin's love nest. But let’s not get languorous here, because hey, did I mention you get free live music? Yes! Music in the skies, what a time to travel. Southwest's Live at 35® series turns your flight into a concert hall at 35,000 feet! From country to pop, you never know who might pop up in the aisle.

Now, the elephant in the cabin: the baggage allowance. The "baggage fee” or as I like to call it, the “how-much-can-we-squeeze-from-passengers-without-them-deciding-to-ship-themselves-as-cargo” fee. A grappling match between you and your suitcase is invariably inevitable. Who needs gym training when you can wrestle with your luggage to stay within the econo-class weight limit, right?

Last, but most certainly not least, let us not forget the unpredictable monster looming over every flight—the flight cancellation policy. Unveiling this Pandora's box is an adventure in itself. Here's a secret: Southwest is quite the good egg in the lot with no change fees or cancellation penalties. Quite the maverick, isn't it?

All in all, remember to scour those airline reviews before you reserve that digital boarding pass. Every airline promises a journey to rival Homer's Odyssey, but we know very few can truly deliver the stars they promise. The wisdom is in the crowd, my friend. The devil is in the flight details.

Nonetheless, flying remains the most efficient way of increasing your potential to have a disastrous day. But despite all the chaos, beauty exists in the uncertainty of the journey. And that my friend, is the undeniable charm of air travel.