Fly Southwest: PWM to Tri-Cities, Tennessee

We get it. Booking a flight can seem like a complex choreographed dance of patience and ingenuity, especially when you're scouring the internet at 2am for the elusive, mystical "Cheap flights" or considering taking an "International flight" just to earn the extra frequent flyer miles. Take our advice, fellow traveler, and cast your gaze towards the 'ever-so-charming' Southwest. And by charming, we mean like that endearing middle-school science teacher who wore socks with sandals but still somehow managed to make photosynthesis seem interesting.

Nothing screams adventure like a Southwest ‘Direct flight’ from undefined in Portland to Tri-Cities. And by 'adventure', we don’t mean crossing a sunkissed tropical beach; think more along the lines of playing hangman with your seat buddy because in-flight entertainment went the way of the dodo. Remember, this is a journey, not a destination...or at least we think that's how the quote goes.

Sinister rumors might suggest Southwest has a penchant for ‘Flight cancellations,’ but let's look beyond that. Look at it as an opportunity to converse with the charming southwest staff who, despite probably wishing they were somewhere sunny with a paperback and a convincing cocktail, will do their best to make you feel better about the fact that you're likely to miss your connecting flight. The time together will surely enrich your life, right after it ruins your day.

If you're a self-proclaimed 'Frequent flyer', there’s no better place to be than at a Southwest terminal. Among endless lines of crying babies, chatty first-time flyers, and bemused tourists, you’ll feel right at home. Every moment is a chance for you to attain enlightenment, each delay another precious moment for introspective contemplation. Satori may be just one 'Flight delay' away. Remember to embrace the journey.

Oh, and speaking of amenities, they are as lovely as the baggage 'allowance'. Southwest's one-two punch of allowing not one but TWO free checked bags is just about as liberating as discovering a hidden Stairmaster at the bottom of your Airbnb rental property. It's like winning the lottery, only to realize you now have to carry your winnings home in coins. But hey, who doesn't love the feeling of waking up with biceps that can double as the 'Rocky Mountains'?

If you're hoping for 'First-class', you're in the wrong place, but don't worry - on Southwest, every seat is a rehearsed compromise between comfort and cheek numbness. First-class envy? A thing of the past. Remember, it's not about the destination (or the 3 inches more of legroom up front), it's about the journey, and Southwest is committed to making it an unforgettable one!

Your 'Flight schedule' might get switched around like the seating plan at a raucous wedding reception, but that's all part of the fun. As you zhush up your rollerbag, steeling yourself for another impromptu game of flight roulette, you’ll come to appreciate the spontaneity – some might even say fluidity - of Southwest. After all, consistency is dull, right?

Take it from us, embracing the unpredictable ride of twirling, swooping, occasionally cancelled but never boring Southwest experience can be as exhilarating as that time you braved the office party after eating three burritos. Strap in, enjoy the rollercoaster, and remember: it's all about the journey, not the destination.